I had to face the reality; I knew though it would shatter away all illusions of the past, dreams, hopes, meanings, understandings and I don’t know what else; But I had to. For I prefer as always to live the truth how sour it may taste.
The moments of this realization were more bitter than I had estimated to be. You expressed in the most lovely way what I always wanted to hear. Only now I knew that you didn’t mean any of them. All the words and feelings that used to drive me crazy seemed like a fallacy. I laughed at your face – I knew I hurt your male ego. Deep inside the sounds of my cries sound proved everything else that was being said, expressed, showed and felt outside – Thanks to the intensity of my innocent feelings! I felt such a terrible imposition; Around me your arms provided me with a support so strong to bear any shock.
Men – countless articles have been written ever on them, their behavior. A lot of psychoanalysis has already been done. I am not going to add any from my experience. I am sure these have been experienced by other women over time and history. But how women perceived it could vary from one to another. The aftermath of such a realization must be unique for most of the cases. I am to add then – my experience.
I feel happy! I feel free…